Rainy Revelations aka The Talk
by Keikokin
Summary: In the middle of a storm can Harry and Draco settle things? COMPLETE SLASH malemale relationship


The Talk  
  
It was an overcast day, and a big storm was imminent. Dark storm clouds had settled over the Hogwarts school grounds.  
  
But, it perfectly matched the mood that Harry was in, so there he sat by the lake after lunch.  
  
He was just sick of it. Why should he have to save the world? Why  
should he not get to be a normal guy, like all the others in school?  
Why this stupid scar? Why could he not have a love life too? Why,  
because the world made him special. And he hated it. He wanted to  
die. He wanted to be allowed to be scared. He was tired of being  
tough for everyone else.  
  
He put his head down on his knees, hugged them close, and closed his eyes.  
  
He opened his eyes, when he noticed someone sitting down next to him. It was Malfoy. Harry wasn't really up for a fight, so he made a move to get up.  
  
"You really don't have to be so brave for everyone."  
  
Malfoy looked at him for a second and looked away. The sneer wasn't on his face. There was something else in his eyes too. It was something in those eyes, that made Harry sit down again.  
  
"But, actually I do. It is expected..." Harry started to say quietly,  
but stopped as he saw Malfoy's look.  
  
Malfoy shook his head at this idea, his gray eyes looking thunderous.  
  
"You have to be brave because you are expected to be? How exactly are  
you supposed to go up against anyone, unless you get the chance to  
flush out your feelings? How can you fight for life, if you never  
live? Are you really living, or are you just a puppet on a string?"  
  
Harry was stunned for several reasons. Malfoy was talking to him, like in a real conversation. But it was as though he totally understood everything, and just like that was making sense of it all. Making sense of everything that had confused Harry these past years at Hogwarts.  
  
"How do you know?" Harry asked dumbfounded.  
  
"Look, my Father, has groomed me my entire life for a destiny I had no  
choice in. I was part of the Dark Lords circle before I could crawl.  
Did I ever get a choice? Did I get to live? Did I get to talk it  
over with anyone? No, be a Malfoy, be a Slytherin, close it off.  
What shite, can't even love who I want."  
  
"I never realized how much we have in common."  
  
Harry was stunned. Draco was pouring out his whole life. And it meant something to him. It was like a gift, or something.  
  
"So, I realized at some point, I needed to get over it. It is like a  
losing streak at Quidditch. You need to make that turning point that  
you are going to go out there and kick some ass, instead of the game  
kicking you. And if you enjoy it, the game becomes sweet."  
  
Draco looked toward the Quidditch pitch. The love for the game flickered across his face.  
  
"So,what are you going to do, Malfoy?"  
  
Harry found it strange to actually want to know he answer to this question.  
  
"Are you asking for yourself, or the Shining Order of Good vs. Evil?"  
  
Draco had what looked like hurt, in his eyes.  
  
"Me, actually."  
  
Draco looked a lot happier about this, and actually smiled at him. Harry could feel his eyes go wide in shock. Did Draco Malfoy just smile? And why did Harry stomach suddenly go soft like a bowl of porridge?  
  
"I am going to find someway to screw over my Father, and his precious  
Dark Lord, and whole asshole lot. If I have to fight them from the  
inside, I will. And if I have to be there to die for – you, I will  
be."  
  
Draco was looking very closely into Harry's eyes, and thunder rolled in the background.  
  
"What do you mean die for me? Shouldn't that be the other way  
around?"  
  
Harry was scared by what Draco was saying. Lightning flashed making the entire scene more surreal than it already was.  
  
"What if you go against him, and it gets all fucked up? Who will be  
there for you? Is there anyone on the inside for you? Well, if they  
brand me with their precious, fucking, Death mark, I will be there to  
wait for you. And if I lack the courage, or they decide not to make  
me a Death Eater, then I will stand by your side to flick off the  
buggers with you."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because, you don't have to do it alone. You don't have to be so  
brave. I am choosing to do this. So if I die, I do it because I am  
willing to. So mote it be -it won't be your fault. You and I are  
just wandering around lost. Let us just agree to this plan, and go  
on; try to live a life. Just maybe we can be friends. Maybe we can  
be more. But we need to trust first. We need to know we can be there  
for the other one. And if I am willing to be there for you one way or  
the other in the Big Battle, you can better believe I can be there for  
the small shit."  
  
"Mal.."  
  
"Draco, for crying out loud, Draco."  
  
Draco was lying down and had propped himself up on one elbow, he looked exasperated. The wind was starting to pick up and it caused Draco's long white hair to fly around a bit. Harry couldn't seem to take his eyes off of it.  
  
"I don't know what to say Draco. What happened to make you decide to  
tell me this? I thought you hated my guts. Has that changed?"  
  
"Yes. I've been thinking a lot lately about what shite we put each  
other through. Why? Is it because we are on different sides? No,  
I've known for a long time I'd never be a willing pawn for the Dark  
Lord. Is it because we got in a fight when we were little first  
years, and couldn't let it go? No, then it finally dawned on me, it  
is because we see the strength in the other one to be able to handle  
our frustrations and angers."  
  
Harry blinked. It made perfect sense, not once would the other back down when getting in a fight with the other. Harry always looked for Malfoy to take his anger, loathing and aggravations out on.  
  
"Deep down, we saw the same shite in the other one's miserable  
existence. We never gave each other more crap - than what we really  
knew the other one could handle. We always seemed able to sense when  
the other one couldn't take it, and backed off. When the other one  
seemed stronger, it began again. It was almost a way of forcing the  
other person back on their feet, by yelling, taunting, screaming, and  
challenging the other, all the time."  
  
"M...Draco. If that is true, then what would happen if we stopped?"  
  
Harry felt afraid again. The knowledge of the constant fights had been reassuring, in some bizarre way. But, there hadn't been a big fight for a long time. But the chance always existed, keeping him on his toes. He didn't know if he could handle that being gone.  
  
"Then we could be one much, much, stronger force. We wouldn't have to  
look for each other to pick a fight. We could just be there for each  
other, whether it was to stand up for the other, or pick them up."  
  
He sat back up, and put his hands on Harry's shoulders. Harry shuddered at the gesture. He was surprised at how warm Draco's hands were, but didn't move. They felt reassuring, somehow.  
  
"You and I would never have to be as brave alone, again."  
  
Draco said this in a very strong voice, as if he was trying to make a point. The wind had picked up and Harry shivered. But he suspected it had more to do with what Draco was saying. Something in his own armor was breaking. His heart seemed to be in his throat, and he felt totally different about Draco, and his life. And yet, he had felt differently about Draco for a long time. He worried about him. And he was tired of hurting him. At some point in time, he had moved beyond it as well. He sat there silently for a minute, taking it all in. That would mean the Dark War would be his only motivation. What if he lost that as well?  
  
"Draco, what if there is no battle?"  
  
"Then I suggest we live life. All the years of our fighting, has made  
me look over everything. I think I've wasted a lot of time. I've  
lived from day to day with no dreams, or hopes. Hours went by like  
lifetimes. Nightmares became part of my day. I could have done so  
much more, if I didn't have to worry about everyone else, and their  
stupid, smegging, expectations. And then, somewhere along the line, I  
fell in love. But, I wasted a lot of time. And I probably ruined  
things, by not realizing what we had sooner. Maybe someday, I'll find  
that it wasn't really wasted time. But, I need to break the cycle,  
here, and now. I need to change things, that are going to mean  
something to me, for the rest of my life."  
  
Draco sat a little closer, and just left one arm draped around Harry. Draco gestured around the grounds with one arm.  
  
"Why do we give our lives away this way? Why did we have to grow up  
so fast? We never got the chance to be kids, and now we are almost  
grown men."  
  
Draco looked turned slightly, and looked directly into Harry's eyes. Harry saw a sea of emotion registered in those gray eyes.  
  
"Harry, have you every been in love?"  
  
Harry didn't know how to answer that one. Had he? Not really, but he did have feelings for the man in front of him that seemed to be whirling around him, echoing the downdraft to the storm.  
  
"Someone should send you a rose." Draco said softly.  
  
Harry seemed to be choking on his words to get them out. He felt like he was having a bit of a breakdown. This little conversation was changing his entire perspective.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"To show that someone out there loves you, and gives a flying about  
Harry – just Harry."  
  
Draco's eyes looked funny again. He looked dead serious, and somehow desperate, and something Harry couldn't put his finger on.  
  
Harry thought back to when he called himself that, 'Harry – just Harry." It was way back when he found out he was a wizard, and his whole life changed. He forgot who he was along the way. When he just wanted desperately for someone to 'give a flying' about him, maybe even love him. But then he because the savior of the wizarding world and forgot how much he just wanted love. It made him angry. It was not only him that had been given the royal shaft, Draco had too. The whole thing set his teeth on edge.  
  
"And what about you Draco? Do you need someone to care about you?  
Fuck it all, Draco! Don't you need someone to love you, to help you  
smile, or to make you laugh? I think in all the years I've known you,  
I've seen you smile or laugh maybe once a year. Each time, your wall  
would come down - like a stone. Every time you seemed human, I felt  
different about you. Then the wall returned. Then you were suddenly  
Lucius Junior, and it was like it didn't happen. In a minute,  
everything can change with you. You know what I need, because you  
need it too. If you found someone to love, screw everything else.  
Everything can change in the blink of an eye. Are you going to regret  
wasted time forever? Are you bloody mad? Do you know what love is  
worth? Take the fools' advice, and take care of it fast. I am not  
saying I want to save the world for me, for fame or any of that  
bullshit. But love, that is worth everything."  
  
A moment of silence passed between them.  
  
"I just never saw the love I had gathering in the darkness of my soul.  
That wall you spoke of protected me. But after I met you, and we  
started our little, vicious, cycle of being there to spur each other  
through anger...yes, it cracked. And I showed emotion by smiling or  
laughing, a major Malfoy faux pas. So, you already saved me. I can  
now choose to keep my wall up or down. What about you –Harry?"  
  
"Sometimes, it just hurts too fucking much - to even think about." Harry felt like he could blow up another Aunt, at the moment.  
  
"Don't you think I know how damn much you have locked, in there?"  
  
Draco pointed at Harry's chest, and tears were brimming in his eyes.  
  
"Draco, why are you even out here?" Harry was biting his own lip, to  
keep himself from crying.  
  
"Because, eventually it will rain." Draco looked up at the storm  
clouds, which were now turning steadily black.  
  
"And no one can see you cry in the rain."  
  
Harry closed his eyes in painful understanding.  
  
"You understand, because that is why you are here too. Aren't I right, Harry?"  
  
"Draco. I just can't seem to get the pain out." Harry hung his head.  
  
"We can leave it all behind. We can start new from today."  
  
"A truce?" Harry looked hopefully into the eyes of the blond.  
  
"No, and yes. We can justify each other, our existence, our destiny,  
by being here for each other - just like this. We can try to maybe  
make life a little happier, for each other."  
  
"A happy life?" Harry laughed bitterly through unshed tears. "That  
would be paradise."  
  
"We can work towards paradise, in the meantime we'll just try to be  
happy. I've learned in the years that if I see you genuinely happy,  
it makes me happy. Is that true for you as well?" Draco's voice was  
unsteady, filled with emotion.  
  
"Yeah, I like hearing your laugh. It used to save my day sometimes."  
Harry admitted painfully.  
  
"And it was all I could do to keep my wall and smirk in place, so you  
wouldn't see my smile as you laughed. I was so worried about blowing  
my cover as the all mighty Slytherin. But, I need more than that now.  
I need to know I can be there to save someone, as they have saved me."  
Draco looked on the verge of losing it.  
  
"Draco, I..." Harry faltered.  
  
"Shhh, it's about to start." Draco tried to smile, but a tear slid  
down his face.  
  
And as it did, it became one with the rain. The soft rain falling through the tree above them - hid their tears. The only clue to their tears was the raw emotion on their faces. Harry took his glasses off, as they became quickly covered with moisture. Draco was startled by the deep, perfect emerald color of Harry's eyes.  
  
"Damn, it Draco I just want to scream." Harry looked desperate for an outlet.  
  
"Then do it." Draco needed an outlet as well.  
  
Harry smiled shakily, leaned his head back, as did Draco. They both screamed at the top of their lungs. And when they stopped, they began to laugh. Later, when they stopped laughing, Draco pulled Harry into his arms. It was a desperate tight grip. Harry was keenly aware of the mutual fear, desperation, and need, of that moment.  
  
"Don't let go" Harry said with a trembling voice.  
  
Draco rolled his head into the wet, dark locks, of the Gryffindor seeker. The combination of the soft hair, and the rain was intoxicating. Draco could feel himself breathing heavier, and his heart tightening. He was overwhelmed that they had made it this far, after years of distance. He knew he needed to continue, but he didn't want to release this hold. He breathed harder, his heart threatening to fly out of his chest.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry am I too heavy for you?" Harry asked starting to pull back.  
  
"No, it isn't that at all." Draco chuckled, was Harry really that naïve?  
  
Harry looked at Draco in a funny way. Draco wasn't sure if Harry didn't understand, or if Harry couldn't see him. He ran a thumb through the rivulets of water racing down Draco's face.  
  
"Thank you, Draco." Harry whispered rolling his face into Draco's  
hold.  
  
"Why are you thanking me?" Draco choked on heart-wrenching emotions.  
  
"For being smart enough to figure us out, our lives, and then for  
coming out here to tell me. And for giving a shit about us." Harry  
took the hand that had been caressing his face and kissed Draco's  
palm.  
  
"I like the sound of that."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Us."  
  
Draco closed his eyes against the pain that saying that one little word had brought. He didn't mean to say it. But there it was. He could feel the tears trickle down his face.  
  
"Draco, are you okay?"  
  
Draco looked away. He didn't know what to say. He could lie. He could say he was okay. He could tell the truth that his heart was writhing in agony. He just cried, happy for the rain.  
  
"It was really hard for you, to just admit that, wasn't it?"  
  
"You have no idea."  
  
"Then tell me."  
  
"Let's just say another wall fell."  
  
"That big fortress around your heart?"  
  
"That would be the one, yes."  
  
"I thought you said you could control those walls."  
  
"I've never had that one fall before."  
  
"You must have if you have fallen in love."  
  
Draco just hung his head and cried. Harry held him tightly in his arms.  
  
"I liked it too, Draco."  
  
"Liked what?"  
  
"The sound of 'us'."  
  
"If this is a dream I better not wake up."  
  
Harry laughed, and held Draco closer.  
  
"Now that sounds like Malfoy."  
  
Draco started to laugh.  
  
"Just give me a reason."  
  
Draco looked up into Harry's eyes.  
  
"A reason?"  
  
"To trust you, to believe there can even be an us, and you won't turn  
back into Malfoy, the git, when we enter that stuffy, old, school."  
  
"You don't believe me?"  
  
"I desperately want to believe you, but I need a reason. I need to  
hear one."  
  
"I...I thought you understood."  
  
"Understood what Draco?"  
  
"I told you I was in love."  
  
"Yes, I remember. And I asked for a reason to trust you."  
  
"Isn't that enough?"  
  
"If you can say it."  
  
"Say what?"  
  
"Damn, Draco I need to hear you say it. Please just tell me. I won't  
laugh. I am not looking to hurt you. I just need to hear you say it  
before I can let myself fall."  
  
"Fall?"  
  
"In love. I just need to know that it is for sure, then I'll give all  
the love in the world I can. Just tell me Draco."  
  
"I..I..love..you."  
  
"Damn, Draco was that so hard?"  
  
"YES!"  
  
Harry started to laugh.  
  
"You said you wouldn't laugh!"  
  
"I was laughing, because getting you to tell me that you loved me was  
like pulling teeth!"  
  
Draco looked embarrassed.  
  
Harry sucked in a breath. Even with his glasses off the sight of Draco wet, with tangles of white long hair in his face, pink cheeked and with rain droplets running down his skin was too much.  
  
"Draco, I think I've fallen for you too."  
  
"Think? I tell you I love you, and you aren't even sure?"  
  
"Well, I want to do something to you that I've never wanted to do before."  
  
"And what precisely would that be?"  
  
"This."  
  
And Harry licked some of the rain, and tears from Draco's face; and then licked over his lips. Then his lips settled on Draco's. Draco's soft lips returned the kiss, and then he gently rolled Harry down onto the ground. Harry pushed one leg between Draco's, and pushed against Draco's groin. Draco's hand was playing with Harry's hair, and the other was holding on to Harry's outside thigh bringing it slowly upwards. Harry exhaled sharply, and as he did Draco's tongue sought out his own. Harry squirmed beneath Draco, until his other leg was outside Draco's. As Draco laid snuggly between Harry's legs, their erections rubbed against each other, and they both groaned at the sensation. Their kisses became more passionate, and urgent. They tried to devour each other. As hips rocked together in an ancient tune, their passion grew. Soon kissing wasn't enough. Harry reached between them, and unzipped both pairs of pants. As their cocks were released they were instantly pressed together. Soon the rubbing, and grinding between the two men increased. It only took a few minutes at this heightened level before they both climaxed, and broke apart from kissing to growl out each other's names. Their orgasms left them panting, and it took a bit before they could each catch their breath. As they both came down off the high, they cuddled together, enjoying the afterglow. The rain just seemed to add a level of sensitivity, occasionally making them shudder.  
  
Soon all of Harry's insecurities came back to him. He could feel himself shake.  
  
"Harry, you okay?"  
  
"I am just nervous, well, um scared really."  
  
"About us?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"I love you Harry. That isn't going to stop when we go inside."  
  
Draco felt Harry relax. Draco reached between them, tucked them both back in, and zipped their pants. He rolled Harry half on top of him, and Harry snuggled into his chest.  
  
"Mmm, I love you too, Draco." 


End file.
